I finally verbalized this goal when my sister was telling me about her recent experiences with weight loss. She mentioned that her body seems to have plateaued at 168 pounds, it likes it there, doesn't want to budge.
I didn't say it out loud but I am afraid that my body likes to weight 202 pounds, that is were it seemed to like to stay all last year. Then in October 2008 I decided that I was not OK with that number and that things had to change, and for a while they did, I think I lost 10 pounds pretty quickly, but then the holidays came and in January I found myself right back at 202. I tried weight loss shakes, they were yummy, I lost weight but then lost interest and was on my way back up to 202 when I decided, once again, that I had to do something. This time, that something is much cheaper, and much simpler. I am counting my calories and exercising. That is it. (Remember all of this was in my head)
I then told her I completely understood what it was like to have your body like a certain weight, and want to stay there. I also told her that my goal was to get down to 140 and that in the past month or so I had lost 5 pounds. She asked me how much more I needed to lose. "Oh, about 50 pounds" was the answer that so easily came out of my mouth. I started doing the math in my head- that is 25% of my body! Then my sister asked if I was willing to put some money behind my goal. "What, Like a bet?" No, not like a bet, she asked me if I had ever heard of the HCG diet. I have. I have a friend who recently lost 50 pounds using HCG. But I just don't know about taking anything, or buying anything. The fact is that losing weight and being healthy is pretty simple, but it is also quite hard. It's a double edged sword.
I know people who used phen-fen, who now have to visit a cardiologist ever year or so to make sure they don't have heart damage. This is something that was prescribed to them by doctors. They lost weight, but then gained it back. Because of that situation I am really leery about taking things to help me lose weight. And so, for now, I won't.
I told my sister that I was going to give myself a year to lose that pesky 50 pounds, and if at the end of the year I was struggling I would probably talk to my Doctor, get some advice- who knows, I could have Poly cystic Ovarian Syndrome or something like that that makes it hard to loose weight, if after that year my doctors says "You know, try this, it will help you get the success you are looking for" then maybe I will try it.
But for now, it is just me, Livestrong.com's MyPlate- to help me count the calories, and my trusty New Balance Shoes. Give us a year, and we will change my life.
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